Saturday, November 29, 2008

"Reflection"










It has been raining here since around 3:00 p.m. yesterday. I love it. There is a possibility for thunderstorms throughout the day. I hope so. Something about rain and storms just relaxes and calms me. Rain unleashes in me a contemplative spirit. That is exactly how I am feeling today.


I usually do not like to watch or listen to the news. There is always more heartache than good usually. Yesterday's news was no exception. My heart goes out to all the families who lost loved ones in Mumbai. My thoughts and prayers also go out to those who lost loved ones in what I feel was a most senseless way; by Black Friday shoppers. Have we become so ingrained with the desire to have and to possess that we could trample a fellow human in the pursuit of a purchase? Obviously the answer to that is yes. It simply boggles my mind.


When contemplating these tragedies especially the Black Friday deaths, it just gives me all the more impetus to build upon my desire for a frugal, simple life. I want to get back to natural living as much as humanly possible. Restarting my garden this past summer let me know that this sort of life is where my heart truly resides. I have to admit that I have let other things over the years sidetrack me and keep me from my goals, but I am determined to turn that around in any way that I can. I will start again with baby steps, but I "will" reach my goals.


I have always been more of an unconventional person. I don't like to follow the crowd, and I don't like to do things simply because others are doing it, or somebody else feels that I should. I have nothing against suggestions, or advice, but I want my own voice to be the one that I hear the loudest. Over the years, I have relegated my own voice to the background and have been very unhappy in doing so. That needs to change.


The upcoming year is fast approaching. It is usually the time that we make resolutions, that are usually broken before the ink dries. I won't wait until then. I am going to use each and every day that I am blessed with "now", to continue to make the changes that I need to live my life in the passionate way that I crave. Each and every day I plan to incorporate more of the things that I love. As the tragedies that are reported on in the news shows, "Tomorrow is promised to no one". We have to do all that we can each and every day that we are granted a chance to do so.


So maybe that will mean that instead of rushing around trying to keep things in order all the time, I will grab a book, a cup of coffee and some time to just relax. It doesn't mean that I will let things go to pot, but it does mean that I will realize that it is alright to just "breathe" sometimes instead of trying to always accomplish something. Yet, there are certain things that I would like to do.


I look forward to planning for my spring garden. The thought of that really excites me! I want to learn to can, and to improve upon my storage techniques. I'd like to have a better savings plan in order. I want to teach myself to play my guitar. There are some home improvements that I want to try my hand at instead of letting them intimidate me. I'd like to continue working to make my home one of those comfortable places that the kids can bring their friends to for fun. Most importantly, I want to continue to strive for that feeling of family and belonging with my loved ones and friends.


I don't want to be one of those people chasing "The American Dream". What does that really mean anyway? No, I want to just live my life as close to my own "personal"dream as I can. For me that means learning to be as self-sufficient as I can. It won't be easy, it will mean lots of hard work, and it will perhaps mean bucking what most people consider "the norm". But you know what, when I look at all the other alternatives out there, I know that it is more than worth it.

Till next time...






Wednesday, November 26, 2008

"A Warm Welcome"


Just wanted to send warm welcome to the new followers of the blog. Welcome Guyz and Earth Heart!!! So nice of you to stop by. A continued thanks to my other "faithful" friends who have been with me since the beginning. A VERY Happy and Safe Thanksgiving to one all. Till next time.....

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

"One Year Ago Today"



Today marks the first anniversary of my mother's death. It does not seem like that much time has passed, but it has. Thanksgiving will always be tied in with her passing.

I have found that regardless of the dynamics of your relationship with your parents, their passing will always leave an indelible mark.

I came on here with the intention of writing something thoughtful, something heartfelt. I even contemplated using the letter that I wrote on her birthday this year.

But instead I will mark this day with simply saying that we remembered, and we will never forget.

Sunday, November 2, 2008

"Long Time No Blog, Again"
















As usual,




it has been forever since I have taken the time to sit down and write something. I don't know what it is, but I have been so tired lately that even thinking about writing has been almost painful.

Just feeling rushed, and tired and pushed to get through each and every day. Updating my blog feels like a luxury.

So on yesterday, I decided that I would work most of the day to make sure that I had today off for the most part. I didn't want to have anything that was pressing or trying or "needed" tending. And since I stuck to the grindstone and got everything done, here I am.

I did take a bit of time this morning to go out into what is left of the garden.

I think that I have been neglecting doing so because as childish as it sounds, working in the garden makes it TERRIBLY difficult for me to want to get back to my routine.

It is like when I work outside, I am transported to a place that I don't want to leave. I don't feel the time constraints, there are no other people and their attitudes to deal with, little noise. I just get so wrapped up into it that I don't want to get back to the norm.

So I did a little raking and watering, and sweeping off the porch. I took in the laundry that I had hung out yesterday, and cleaned some things from the yard. I had the boys out to help with a thing or two before setting them free and we got the garbage ready for pick up tomorrow. I filled my watering bin back up, tidied up the hose, and then headed back inside. I have the basil that I planted sitting on a shelf next to the back door. The scent from it a constant reminder of some of the things that truly make me happy.

Tomorrow it is back to the routine and the rush, and the "must do's. I am looking forward to the end of this semester even though the Holidays are fast approaching. I got half of my shopping done already and will concentrate on the other half this month. I wanted it do it thoughtfully, but as quickly as possibly.

Yet, no matter how rushed, or pushed, or overwhelmed I have been feeling lately, I am still grateful that I have something to be rushed, pushed, or overwhelmed about. Got to find the positives.

Hope that all are well and that life is treating you kindly. Till next time....