I have not been to my blog in a while. Mostly it has been due to school and just life in general. Lately it has just been due to something that I cannot comprehend. I probably would not have come here tonight but received an alert and an inquiry as to if I was o.k. (Thank you Smallpines). At first I didnt' know if coming to my blog of all places to discuss this would somehow minimize it. But in the past, my blog has been a place that I have been able to come to to share, think out loud, and to use as a catharsis. Plus, I have always believed that when someone takes time out of their busy life to ask of your well being, it is only proper to respond.
I was asked if everything is ok and it is with deep pain and regret that I must say no. I am numb. I am devastated. Last Saturday, one of my sisters and two of her sons (10, 11)
were brutally murdered. I could have just said that they had died, but with what they endured that explanation would have just been too simplified. They didn't just die, they suffered. It is being called a case of domestic violence. They will be laid to rest this Wednesday.
Something like this is very hard to accept, process and come to grips with. Hard to believe. It was and is just so senseless. I don't really know what to say.
But, I will encourage everyone who stops by here to love yourself, love and respect those closest to you and embrace each and every day. Life is short.
I will be back when I can. Till next time....
Sunday, March 1, 2009
It has been raining here for the past three days. As I look outside of the window this morning it is snowing!!!! Snow is something of a big deal around here as it doesn't do so very often. My little one immediately wanted to go out in it. I love to see the innocence of childhood.
While I did incur some minor flooding, the constant, steady rain this weekend put me into a most reflective mood. When it rains, I like to go outside in it. It is during these times that I have some of my clearest thoughts. It is in the stillness of such moments that I find a keener sense of purpose. I feel my most grateful, I am my most thankful. I can truly live in the moment and take in everything around me. I can block out the "what ifs", and the "what ares" if only for a moment. I wish that moments like this could last forever. But alas, they can't.
I haven't been around "blogville" for a while. It seems that things are speeding up more than slowing down. With school, the boys, making sure the finances, and the pantries are in order, blogging has just not been given a place of priority.
And speaking of priorities, such things have been foremost in my mind these days. For me, that is akin to a stocked pantry, freezer, bills being paid and making sure that we have our "needs".
We are living in a very uneasy climate right now. Many people are losing their jobs, their homes, a few are even losing their minds. Save for the grace of God, go I. Some are finger pointing, blaming, and forgetting. Unbelievably, many aren't making any changes in the way they have been living even in our economic decline. Many are forgetting that the conditions that caused this recession, or depression or whatever label one wants to add to it, didn't happen overnight, nor will it disappear overnight. And allowing fear and anger to be our reactions to it won't make it disappear any faster. In fact, I am of the opinion that such reactions only serve to rob of us of the energy that we will need to put into place our own individual means of survival.
I think we would all do well to be at least thinking about a way to put into affect "habits" that will make our going less stressful in "uncertain times" as many are now calling them.
Because let's face it, without some monies, and the support of one another, our going will be a lot tougher.
Things like bartering, and canning, and gardening, and maybe even sharing residences with our families, and even some friends might become our "new" normal. Are we ready for those possibilities? Personally, I want to brush up on my baking skills. I'd like to figure out the best way if I have to eventually make my own dog food, or other things that I depend on others to supply. But,the most important thing at least for me is to make sure that there is always a roof. For the other stuff, there are alternatives. Those that came before us found ways around the electrical, even the plumbing. But having that roof, just makes dealing with the alternatives that much better.
The time has come upon those of us that garden to get our plans into action. Last year's garden has taught me what I need to be aware of this year. Not to overplant, and not to underplant either. My Spring Break will be coming up in a few weeks and I hope to take that time to get things into the works. Lots of clean-up in store for the preparations, but it has to be done. Lots of indoor re-stocking and de-cluttering needs to be done as well. Preparation is the key.
It all comes down to priorities and bottom lines. The bottom line is that we need to have some things as priorities. Because when it is all said and done, the only "hand" that we will be able to truly depend on dangles out of the bottom of our shirtsleeves."We" are the answer to the problems that we face. We will have to call upon our strengths, our energies, our wiles, and our knowledge, to put into affect a "Lifeplan" that will serve our own individual needs and those of our families.
So no matter what economic or other situations that surrounds us, if you are warm, and, fed, and among your family this first day of March, be grateful. If you still have a roof and a good chance of keeping it, be thankful. If you have enough money to buy gas to fill your tank this week, or insurance for medicines that you need to keep going, rejoice. If you still have a job, or savings, be humbled.Work hard now to set up a contingency plan that you might need later. None of us knows what tomorrow will bring to our doorsteps. Continue to find ways to take care of yourself, and even in times of scarcity, don't be too afraid to care for others. Best to all, Till next time...